On The Road

I'm between moves, so I'm on the road for at least the next 10 days with most of my stuff in storage. This is going to be a challenge for my raw food fare, and I am curious to see how it will all pan out.

I feel pretty confident about what I need in order to be successful with this lifestyle, and the importance of each of those things was never more apparent than it was a couple weeks ago when I didn't have what I needed. Between the sprained foot, the travel, and my limited access to foods (and lots of access to the Food Network), it was a recipe for a disaster.

In fact, I did finally have a cooked meal at the end of all of that. I didn't give myself too much grief over it, but I also know that can be a slippery slope. One exception can lead to many. At this point, I really believe it's not as much about will power as it is preparation. If I am sure to make sure that I have everything that I need, then I don't have to fight cravings and temptations. If I run out of food, or only have access to things that I don't like, then I have to white knuckle it.

I finally had the cooked meal after a few days of weeping, wailing, and gnashing my teeth. It just wasn't worth it. Emotionally, I needed that release, and I'm okay with that. 

Moving Forward

But now, here I am on the road, and I know that this is a difficult environment for me - more so because it's going to be such a long stint. I don't have my food prep tools, I can't get a lot of food at once, and the only car we have is a stick shift (which I can't drive), so I'm at the mercy of someone else to take me around to get what I need.

On the other hand, I'm eating raw, so it's not like I need a stove or anything. I can make a meal out of a bag of apples. That's easy. But emotionally, I can only eat so many bags of apples and carrots before my brain goes, "Wait a second... This isn't a meal! Abort! Abort!" So, I'm a little worried about these next several days. 

Although, I will say that I have gotten my order down pact when I go to restaurants. I don't even look at the menu. I just say, "I'd like a salad of greens, sun-dried tomatoes, raw mushrooms, olives, avocado, artichoke hearts, and your vinaigrette dressing." The artichokes are a cheat, but boy does it make the whole thing so much more bearable.

Wish me luck!

Don't Worry - Still Raw

I barely got through this most recent food crisis. It's been a rough week and it seemed I was being sabotaged from every angle. To make matters worse, I admit I spent a lot of time drooling over foods that I've sworn off for at least the next 6 months. By the time we hit the road to come home yesterday, and I had nothing but a bag of apples to snack on while my husband was feasting on some fragrant fried chicken, I was a mess.

When my husband stepped out to pump some gas, I fell apart in a pile of tears. I sobbed and prayed, and sobbed and prayed. It was by far my weakest moment of these last two months.

As the snot and tears were running down my face, I simultaneously thought these two things:

1) These were the feelings that I'd been expecting and fearing all along. This was the state that I have felt so grateful to have miraculously avoided for the last two months.

2) Thank you, thank you, thank you God that I haven't felt like these every day for the last two months.

So, I had a good cry, and then I chomped down on my apples. I've found that it's a lot harder for me to feel bitter and angry with a full stomach - regardless of what it's full of. And today, the crisis is over and I'm back to feeling like a raw foodie inside and out. I do not feel like it is a thick, stinky garment that I'm being forced to wear. I'm back to feeling like I'm making a choice, and that makes ALL the difference.

If I'm doing something because I want to do it - because I'm choosing this for myself - then I am 100% more likely to be successful than if I'm doing something because I feel like I have to. As soon as I have that feeling, I start feeling trapped, angry and bitter. That will absolutely end in me quitting. Every. Single. Time. Especially on the food front - feeling trapped is a MAJOR trigger for me because of some of my past food experiences.

I can point to different pools of fat on my body and be like, "Yeah, that's from the winter of '02; this one's from that one time in '06." Yup. My pounds gots stories! Which is why I need to be very careful about the ones I tell myself, and the ones I believe. Today, I'm feeling the "happily after ever" vibe.

Thank.
Goodness.

I'm feeling much more centered and in control of things. However, I'm still in desperate need of a thorough grocery run and have to rely on my husband finding the time in his busy busy schedule to go to the store for me, as I'm still spending most of my time with my sprained foot elevated. But the good news is that he can't last long without food, either, and at this rate, we'll both be dead by midnight tomorrow if he doesn't get to the store first thing in the morning. 

6 things to Combat Cravings - PLUS ONE

I wrote a post called "6 Things to Combat Cravings" early into my raw food adventure. Well, it's time to add a number 7:

STAY AWAY FROM THE FOOD NETWORK!!

2 Months Down & The Glass is Half Empty!

I've hit my two-month mark, and it could not have been ushered in any more dramatically.

Last Thursday, I was on my way down to Trader Joe's and I stepped into a pothole and sprained my foot. My husband was out of town at the time, so he came home to pick me up and bring me back to his out-of-town event. So, I've spent the last five days in a hotel room with my foot propped up on a pillow, and absolutely miserable on the food front.

First of all, I started this whole adventure pretty much out of food (hence my trip to Trader Joe's). My husband didn't have time to go the grocery store, so I was at the mercy of the few things that I brought, and the occasional room service. Not ideal. When I'm traveling, I try to prepare some of my dehydrated favorites in advance to help tide me over.

The hubby was finally able to run to the store a couple days in, but he forgot the three most important items that I requested (but he was a true hero for getting me everything he did, and he even got me some appreciated extras). So, I had a bounty of fresh foods - but not the key items that would have made it a bounty of deliciousness.

Second of all, I've been in a pathetic state! Not only did I sprain my left foot, but the extra strain placed on my right foot caused a severe flare up of the capsulitis in my right foot, which is just a fancy way of saying I was screwed twice over. I can barely walk on EITHER foot.

Third, I've wanted nothing more than to comfort myself with food. I haven't even had the privilege of being able to create some awesome raw gourmet for myself. No, the peak of my days have been a nice crunchy carrot, and yet ANOTHER salad - ugh!

So, what have I been doing these last few days? I've been feeling sorry for myself and watching the Food Network. That's right - I've been indulging in food porn.

I did go to a raw food restaurant today, but that just added insult to injury. It was a major disappointment. (Although my hubby did get me a nice raw chocolate bar for desert.)

I know that this is a negative post, but I'm just wallowing in this negativity today. It is what it is. And I have just four more glorious months to go.

The Silver Lining

But I will say that I've been very amazed by how quickly my sprain is healing. I've been doing zero icing or anything, so I really think that the raw food diet is helping to accelerate my healing process.

What's Changed?

My cousin came to visit over the weekend and she asked me what's changed since I went raw. I drew a total blank. I couldn't think of much. Although, I think there have been more changes than I realize. If I went back to cooked foods tomorrow, I'm sure I would be reminded of a few things that I'm not having to deal with anymore.

One thing that's definitely different is that I am more fully present in my own life. This week is a perfect example of this. My husband is out of town, and I'm here by myself. In the past, the second he walked out the door, I was making a list of all the junk foods I was going to go buy. I'd fill my freezer with ice cream, and my cupboards with sugary cereal, and I would eat myself into a coma until he got home.

The last time he went out of town, I was just getting into the raw food lifestyle, so I spent that time immersing myself into this new way of doing things. I spent those days experimenting with different recipes, watching YouTube videos, and staying away from the grocery store to avoid temptations.

This week marks my first time being alone since then. I am not binging, I am not grazing, I am not freaking out in the middle of my kitchen. I'm just here. I'm between work projects, so I have the luxury of choosing how to spend each of these wonderful days that my husband is gone. I'm reading, writing, and catching up with old friends. I am so present, and so mindful of every decision that I make.

I feel so comfortable in my own skin. I feel so aware of the limitless options in front of my. I don't feel compulsive about anything I'm doing (well, that's a lie. I'm actually procrastinating working on my book, so I'm going to Facebook every five minutes to put it off).

So, if my cousin were to ask me again, "What's changed since you went raw 8 weeks ago?"

I'd say, "Everything."

Weight Loss After 7 Weeks Raw

I've been discouraged to find that I'm not losing weight very fast on this raw food diet. I don't weigh myself because I get too crazy about the numbers, but I would guess that I've only lost about 10-15 pounds.

Don't get me wrong - I'll take every last one of those pounds. It's just that I thought I'd be losing weight much faster than this. I have only gone down one pants size, and it's been almost two entire months.

However, I will say that:

1) Weight loss is not the reason I'm doing this - it just happens to be a great side effect.

2) Part of my problem might be my hormonal issues. I have a tumor on my pituitary gland that makes everything screwy, and my chiropractor told me a long time ago that might be one of the reasons I struggle with losing weight (although at the time I thought he was silly because I knew about those secret goodies under my driver's seat).

3) I'm still not eliminating the way I want to be - herbs and all. I've never struggled so much with my plumbing while I've been doing so much for it! I think I'm going to have to do a cleanse soon - ugh.

4) I carry my weight like a pregnant lady (which is kind of ironic since I can't get pregnant right now). This means that I carry most of my weight in my stomach. Even though that particular part of my anatomy seems to be the most allergic to calories (it swells right up!), the rest of my body does seem to be shrinking. My arms and legs are getting more slender, and my boobs have definitely begun to shrink, which I'm pretty happy about.

5) I'm still losing weight, regardless of how minuscule the number may seem. That means that I am headed in the right direction, and I can be sure that I will continue to lose as I continue on this path.

So, all in all, I think I just need to stop my worrying. It's not going to make a difference, and I am making a difference with my choices right now. I just need to remember why I'm doing this, and keep trucking along.

Essential Tools for a Raw Food Diet

As I've been preparing raw foods the last several weeks, I haven't gone out and purchased a lot of tools. I've generally been making do with what I have. This enabled me to dive right in without creating an expensive barrier to entry for myself, but it's also added to some of my kitchen frustrations as I've found myself limited more than once.

If you can get your hands on some or all of the tools listed here, I think they will make the difference between getting by and thriving on this diet. I have spent a lot of extra time in the kitchen trying to make it without some of these things, or I have just had to avoid certain recipes all together. I would much rather be able to have the resources to do everything and anything that I want.

That being said - you don't need them; they just make things easier. You don't need anything fancy to throw together a salad, or prepare a big bowl of fruit. Personally I've found that I've outgrown my hillbilly appliances these last almost-8 weeks, and it's time to upgrade a few things. But I'm kind of glad I've gone about things THIS way instead of making a major investment right up front.

It's kind of like a gym membership - it's better to get one after you've outgrown your living room and gotten tired of running around the block, instead of signing a year contract thinking THAT is what's going to motivate you. Outgrow what you have - and then reward yourself with the extra resources. You'll be much less likely to take them for granted, and much more likely to use them.

Vitamix - or other high-powered blender

Okay, it's time for this girl to break down and sell a kidney or something so I can afford to get a Vitamix. That's a really high-powered blender that will make my life so much easier. The other day, I spent almost two hours making a "quick" pumpkin pie recipe that should have taken about 30 minutes tops. Even after all that, the pie still wasn't creamy enough and I hated the texture, which wasn't helped by the fact that I didn't peel the pumpkin first (I didn't know I was supposed to; I guess the person writing the recipe didn't consider that there are Gwens out there that need even the baby steps spelled out).

In addition, my almond yogurt is just crap because I can't puree the mixture fine enough with my blender.

Spiralizer

I also must have a spiralizer. I'd already been thinking about it, but the deal was sealed earlier this week when I went to a raw restaurant and tried the zucchini noodles with cashew Alfredo. It was a party in my mouth! The cafe was selling the spiralizer for $50, but that's too expensive; I'm ordering mine here for about $35. Also, you can see a video recipe using one on my last blog post.

Mandolin 

This is something that will cut your foods almost paper thin. I haven't felt at a total loss without one, but I've passed up a lot of good looking recipes since I don't have one. I recently saw a ravioli recipe that calls for thinly sliced jicama, so I'm considering this much more seriously now. The alternative is to cut your vegetables by hand, but I just can't seem to get my ingredients thin enough.

Big Butcher Knife


I'd also like to get a big butcher knife, like this one. This would help when opening up the young coconuts. I'm getting pretty good at opening them without this tool, but it's cost me my Miracle Blade knife that I've had for years, so now I'm in the market for a new knife anyway. I'm currently using a sharp knife to cut away the husk on the top, and then smacking the dome around the edges with the back of a hammer. It's very effective, but probably not as sanitary as using something that has been through the dishwasher. You can see a video on how to easily open a coconut here.

Dehydrator

I use this almost daily. There are a wide range of models out there, and a wide range of prices. I bought mine off of craigslist for about $15 and it was like new. Used dehydrators are like used bread machines - they're as good as new because the person that bought them had a world of good intentions, but never figured out how to use them. Lucky me!

I've used this a lot, and I plan on using it more as I branch out and try new things. I had some raw nachos at a raw restaurant earlier this week, so now I'm itching to try some chips. I've made burgers, sun dried tomatoes, and kale chips very regularly. I'll be trying some raisins tomorrow since I have two bags of black grapes that aren't good for anything else.

Food Processor

This is invaluable - especially if you're not ready to invest in a Vitamix. Sadly, I just have this sorry little contraption called an Ultimate Chopper. Don't get me wrong - I love it; but it's so SMALL. It fits about two cups of content, which is NOT enough when you're trying to make raw food dishes. You should have seen me making my pie this week. I knew that I wouldn't be able to get everything pureed using the blender, so I chopped everything before throwing it into the blender. But since my UC is so tiny, it took several chopping cycles. Load, chop, dump; load, chop, dump - it drove me nuts!

I'm going to invest in a much bigger chopper very soon.

Juicer

I have a juicer, but it's in storage at my sister's house in Oklahoma, so I haven't been doing any juicing yet. I feel like this is a must, though, because I've been struggling getting as wide of a variety of foods and nutrients that I want. Almost, all the raw food gurus I've subscribed to really make a big deal out of juicing. The other day, I was literally craving a beet, so I just pureed it in my blender, then strained it through a nut bag. This worked well enough, but it was messy and required several more steps than if I'd just had my juicer handy.

This will also be a great way for me to get in some of the fruits and vegetables I don't actually want to eat. I can just juice them and blend the flavors with other things that I enjoy.

Need vs. Want

All that being said, I would encourage you NOT to put off taking the plunge until you have these tools. If you see these tools as a barrier to entry, then you'll be much more likely not to do it at all - or the opposite will happen. You will go out and spend $500 on all these fancy contraptions with the best of intentions, and then donate them to Goodwill a year later because you found a million other reasons not to get started.

Hmmm - on second thought, you go right on ahead and make the investment. I'll be gleaning your goodies soon ;)